Conquering the Giant

This morning, I braved the cold weather and dark skies, and went for a run. During my post workout shower, it hit me that today I ran farther than I've ever run before. 

I feel invincible. 

Challenges ahead.

As I mentioned recently, Matt ran a marathon today. For those of you who don't quite know what a marathon means... it's 26.2 outrageous miles.

I also mentioned that Matt hadn't done any training. It was actually kind of irritating. I mean, who does he think he is... people train for a long time for these things. But...he just thought he could do it for fun?

Well, he finished.  In five and a half hours...

If you don't understand the significance of that... just know that it is pretty embarrassing for him.

On top of the fact that his time royally sucked... he walked the last 5 miles and hobbled across the finish line.

We were there for a long time waiting... and I saw tons of people finish before him... and not one of them walked.

It was kind of gratifying to see him fail. Not because I like seeing people fail. Trust me, if he would have prepared even a little bit, I would have been cheering him on. But, I think that he needed that shot to his ego. He thought he would be passing all of the women... fail. He thought he would do better than the elderly...bigger fail.

As you can tell... I frown upon entitlement.

Anyway... while waiting for Matt to finish, Charlotte and I decided that we want to run in the race next year. Not the Marathon... oh no... not the marathon. But, at the same time, there is also a half-marathon  and a 10k. So, I think either would be an obtainable goal.

Charlotte also informed me that, this December there is a 5k that she always participates in. So... I think I'm going to do it.

Here is the deal... I have two options. I can walk it... run it...or do a combination of the two.

I want the challenge of running it. But, I'm not sure that 6 weeks is enough time to prepare... actually I know it isn't.

So, I'm thinking, that if I could run half of it, and walk the rest... that would be pretty cool. Right?

...I need to make a training school. I don't wan't to embarrass myself... like other people around here do!

So, on Sunday, our little family is making it's way to Raleigh, to watch Matt run in his first marathon. Cool right?

Here is the thing. Most people train for months to run a marathon...years even. Matt, on the other hand, just decided (about three days ago) that this weekend he was going to crank out 26.2 miles without even training. Don't get me wrong, he has been doing a lot of preparation in the form of carb loading. Tonight he ate a whole pizza by himself. I looked at him and thought, "I could train for a marathon."

Although I fear the outcome of this bizarre test he is putting himself through, I have to say, it is a little inspiring. 

I recently started running. 

Despite the fear that I've already blogged about this story, I think it is important (?) that I share my experience? 

Okay, Okay...nobody cares, but it is a funny story. 

A few weeks ago, I decided that I wanted to start running. So, I did what every legit runner does, and I downloaded a couch to 5k program on my ipod. (Note the sarcasm!) It was going pretty well, every day I was getting a little better, and I was learning just how many muscles were involved in running. 

But then disaster struck. 

One night, I was going for my evening run, and between runs (2 minutes on 1 minute off) my knees just started hurting. The farther I walked the more they started to hurt. At that point, I was probably a mile away from home, and I seriously thought that I might pass out, or throw up....or die.

Okay, that is a little dramatic, but it hurt really, really bad. 

By the time I hobbled home, I sad on the couch, and my knee were horrifically swollen. 

So, I decided that I would take a break from running. 

Since then, I've learned how bad running on pavement is for your knees, and I've researched some proper running techniques. I know a lot of people run on treadmills, but that just isn't for me. I get to bored, and I like a challenge.

So, Wednesday night, before trick or treat, I wen't on my first run since my bad experience. Although I'm definitely in better shape than I was a few months ago, running was just as difficult as it was the very first time... which was disappointing. 

Next year, I hope to participate in a couple of 5ks. My best friend and I are looking for a fun Mud Run to sign up for, and there is a 5k for Arthritis (which my mom suffers from), that I would love to participate in at the end of next year. 

I have a long way to go, but I'm enjoying the journey! 

Make sure to send Matt some good vibes for Sunday! He is going to need all the help he can get!  

Strong is the New Skinny

My cousin just joined a cross-fit gym. 

For those of you who have never heard of cross fit, it is basically a really fast, hard core workout. You work out as hard as you possibly can for like fifteen minutes, and then you are done. 

Let me tell you, people who do cross fit are super buff and in awesome shape. 

My goal, is to one day be able to join a cross fit gym.  I could join now. A lot of people who are in much worse shape than I do join, and have awesome results. But, I think I would rather work up to it, and get in better shape before I join. 

Speaking of being in shape, every time I think I'm starting to get in shape, I get outdone buy an old lady...seriously. 

On Monday, I went to a step class. When I got there, I looked around and everyone else in the class was at least 20 years older than me. I figured it would be a piece of cake.

Oh how wrong I was. 

Admittedly... I kept up fine, but I really struggled with the routine. I think once I practice I will really like it. But man, those old ladies sure know how to go "around the world."

Last night, I went to an aerobics class. I was on the elliptical a few weeks before and the class looked really fun, so I thought I'd give it a try. Once again, the majority of my classmates were at least 55. Even the instructor was a retired grandma. 

...totally kicked my ass. 

I really enjoyed it though. I kind of like working out. Not while I'm doing it. When I'm exercising, I just want to be done. But, sitting here tonight, I just want to be at the gym, with loud music and fun people.

I'm excited for the day that I sit back and say that I'm in the best shape of my life. 

It's coming... 

To be honest... I kind of forgot about this blog. It's funny, because this time last year, I was so dedicated to recording every struggle and success on my path to weight loss.

But, as you all know, life is crazy... and I am busy. Consequently, I don't blog as often as I would like, but tonight just seems like a blogging kind of night, so here I am.

But alas, this is a fat blog...and I'm still fat, so I guess I should start with that.

I graduated in April, and my weight was about that same that it had been all throughout college. Definitely not a healthy weight, but at least I wasn't gaining.

When I moved to North Carolina, the day after my 22nd birthday, things changed.

My cousin Charlotte has always been a proponent of living a healthy lifestyle. She eats right, and loves to exercise. So naturally, when I moved here, I adopted a lot of aspects of her lifestyle.

I've been eating foods that I never knew existed before. Quiona, Polenta, Power Tacos.... I could go on forever. I love cooking, and finding new, healthy recipes. If I'm able to keep up on this blog, I think I'm going to start posting recipes, because they are too good not to share!

After my vacation this summer, I joined a new, amazing gym. I'm not at a place where I LOVE working out yet, but I'm getting there. I don't dread working out, which is a huge step. I've also learned a lot about what a  true workout is. Hint: If you are just doing cardio, and calling it a workout... you lose.

As part of my membership, I was given two free sessions with a personal trainer. My trainer, Tracy, is a huge fitness buff. The other day, she ran 38 miles in a day... I trust her. During the first session, she showed me a basic strength training routine, and gave me a few tips on how to boost my cardio.

Last weekend, I met with her for my second free session, and discovered that I've made some pretty great progress. From the day after my vacation until now, I've lost 24 lbs. I've also lost inches in a lot of my "problem areas", particularly my arms. I lost 1.25 inches off of each arm. Tracy said that she hardly ever sees anyone lose more than half an inch off their arms, so I guess I should consider myself lucky.

Once Tracy realized how serious I was about getting in shape, she gave me a more challenging fitness routine to follow for the next eight weeks. After that, I will have to pay for my sessions, but I definitely think it is worth it.

It is amazing how much things can change when I focus less on becoming skinny, and more on being healthy.

Things are going really well, and I'm happy... which makes all the difference in the world...

A lot has changed.

It is nearly two in the morning, and it has just occurred to me that I haven't updated this blog in months...

So much has changed since then. My last post was all about how I had a new accountability partner, and how we were going to go on this big diet and finally lose weight. But... that kinda fell through.

I am not sure that I can go into details without the fear of being sent before a firing squat, and I'm a little to classy for that anyhow. But, let me just say this : I have learned that no matter how much time and energy you dedicate to a relationship, and no matter how much time you devoted to someone else's problems, laughing with them, or praying for them, there is no guarantee that friendships will last forever. People who you thought would always be there for you can turn into strangers overnight, and the more drama someone has in their life, the more likely it is that you will turn into drama for them in the future.

I have also learned that when friendships end, it is usually for the best. You don't realized how emotionally draining any relationship really is until you severe ties with that person.

The thing is, I am happy now. I know this is supposed to be my "fat blog", but instead of worrying about how I look, I worry about how I feel. Am I healthy? Do I love myself?

When I started this blog, I felt as if I had to lose weight to have any sense of self worth. But, as I mature, I realize that there is so much more to who I am than the number I see when I step on the scale. Do I love the way I look in the mirror? Not really. But do I hate the way I look in the mirror? Definitely not!

Letting my weight enslave me was one of the worst things that I have ever let myself do. I don't know how I let my goal to be skinny consume me, but it was no more healthy than the fact that I am overweight to begin with.

I'm learning to love myself, because these days I realize more and more how much I am loved by those around me.... I trust their judgement.

So, for now I'm not going to focus on how fast I can lose weight or how skinny I can become. I am going to focus on slowing making healthy changes, and give my body what it deserves, no matter how big or how small I become. I'm going to live my life the best way that I can. I'm going to have fun, experience new things... and eat all of the banana splits that I damn well please!